The Legend of Mr. Fuzzyball Puffypants and Mrs. Bill

Many moons ago, while executing our wedding planning schedule spreadsheet, it came time to get our wedding license. A pretty straight forward task if you live in Brooklyn. Head down to the municipal building, fill out a form, wait in line, pay a fee and Ta-Da! You can now legally get married in the state of New York. It was that easy. Even waiting in line wasn't all that terrible. There were several other couples ahead of us running the gamut from a young Hasidic couple, a caribbean couple, some old ball miss matches that make you scratch your head, and Ronnie and Sammy from the Jersey shore. A fair representation of Brooklyn if I do say so myself, Marty Markowitz would be proud.

What we didn't know, was that folded into this process was the ability to change your name. The back of the form simply stated that if any party wishes to change their name, they can do so by indicating below. It made no differentiation between bride or groom, first name or last name, it simple asked you to put down what you would like your new name to be. This was a moment of pure excitement for me, a flash of brilliance had erupted in my head. I could forever be known, legally, as Mr Fuzzyball Puffypants.

I immediately raised my newfound wishes with the future mrs, but she laughingly, and lovingly, rejected the idea. She had no desire to be Mrs. Fuzyball Puffypants. I was devastated to say the least. Any future enjoyment I would have received from the people I handed my passport to had vanished. Entering nightclubs would no longer be accompanied by second glances from bouncers, cashiers would no longer question my personal checks, and my children would no longer be beaten up at school. Daily. Instead, life goes on as WMD. Please don't tell Bush and Cheney, but I was here all along.

However, despite Claire's refusal to accept a life of mockery with me, this did raise a seemingly important question. Tradition stands in western cultures that brides adopt the surname of the groom. In this case Claire Barrett would become Claire Darby. There were only two problems with this: 1) We had never really talked about it and 2) We were leaving the country soon and would not have the time to update everything properly (bank accounts, passports, SS#, credit cards, beneficiary forms, IRAs, email, etc). We had a wedding to plan and a RTW trip to take and couldn't be bothered with all that paperwork. By "We" I mean Claire.

The couple in front of us were merely Ronnie and Sammie look a likes and came off rather well adjusted from their conversation we eavesdropped on.
There was no hope of an eruption into fisticuffs that would delay their processing, leaving us with only a few minutes to discuss the name change issue. We were next in line and a decision needed to be made.

This wasn't something that was on our spreadsheet or even something that we had talked about in any length of depth. I'm not a stickler for tradition and Claire infamously is not a stickler for paperwork (you can ask her old boss all about that). Simple enough.  We both felt it was unnecessary at this time, and if we ever changed our minds we could take care of it in the future. Right now we just wanted to file the form and get on with the day. We both needed to go to work, and you know, make money.

I still would have preferred life as Mr. Fuzzyball Puffypants, but we both felt the name change was a non issue.  We forgot all about it until the day of our wedding when we were asked about it. Some reactions were mixed, but others still were unexpected. Apparently I was now married to a modern woman. Perplexing to us because A) I've always felt Claire was modern (independent, stylish, charming, beautiful, etc) and 2) because we never saw this as an issue (from any perspective).

On a future occasion when talking to my dad, he asked me how "Mrs. Darby" was doing, and being my father's son I responded "Mom's great". I had to correct him that Claire was in fact not Mrs. Darby, so he has taken to calling her Mrs. Bill. Admittedly, the thought of her as a claymation character prone to catastrophic encounters makes me giggle on the inside. The name Mrs. Fuzzyball Puffypants however, makes me out right laugh maniacally. There are so many other important things to take care of first that it has gone from a non issue to a non priority. We might discuss it someday, but for now we need to find jobs, and you know, make money.

- Bill



A note from Claire: seeing how this post largely has to do with me I thought I'd put my two cents in. It really never mattered to me what my last name was, I am seriously allergic to paperwork and that was the reason I didn't rush to do it all before we left. I never would have got my passport back in time for the trip anyways. I think women must have never had to worry about these things back in the day because they didn't have bank accounts of their own and retirement accounts and passports and all the things that their husbands were in charge of anyways. At this point, I don't think my status as "wife" changes at all according to what my last name is and I do like the sound of "modern woman" it has a nice ring to it, so I will keep the name I was born with, I think it suits me better anyway. Our future kids can have Darby though, that's a tradition I'll stick with. And I need someway to prove who the baby daddy is. Ha! Just kidding. Maybe ;)

Anyways, what are your thoughts on the matter? Married or not married I think every woman has an opinion on this...

WE DO!!!!

The wedding FINALLY happened last Saturday! I still can't believe how beautiful and amazing it was. The weather cleared up, Bill's tux disaster worked out perfectly, our guests had an awesome time, the ceremony went pretty smoothly for not having one minute of practice time, and the restaurant did a wonderful job on the food, drinks and service. We want to thank our friends and family who participated in the ceremony, there were lots of moments where i teared up and tried not to cry so my makeup wouldnt get ruined! I have to give shout out to Hil for making me look my absolute best under tight time constraints. We woke up at 6:30am to get started on getting us both ready and at 10:30 the final touches were being put on and we were rushing out the door! My favorite moments were sitting with my parents before the ceremony having a chat, getting advice from a 7 year old girl to "just be happy", saying I DO!, shutting down the neighborhood with our very own parade, delicious mojitos, seeing our guests get very drunk :), the kentucky derby after party, the after-after party on wes's roof and the after- after-after party eating cheeseburgers in my dress...mmmmm!! my dad said it was like a woody allen movie, where new york city and all the people are beautiful and perfect. all the small details we worked on paid off, and bill even surprised me by going to the store the morning of and buying tons of glass vases he filled with white roses and put them in the aisle and on the stage. it made everything just a little more special :) we will post the professional photos once we go through all of them with our photographer, but this is one a friend took that we love.

-Claire

And the winner is...

The Sheraton Hotel, downtown brooklyn.  The better rates, CSR, brand new facility and parking sealed the deal.  We have 20 rooms blocked from Friday, May 6th until Saturday May 7th, and 3 rooms blocked from Sunday in case a few people want to stay a little longer. Reservations must be made no later than April 6th, 2011 after which they will release our hold and you're on your own.  Reservations can be canceled up to 72 hours prior to arrival without penalty so if you decide you don't want to spend the night after all, you have a 3 week window to change your mind.

Also, if we fill 80% of the wedding block, there's a free suite upgrade for the bride and groom (that would be us), so we'd like to thank you in advance for helping make our night just a little more special.

Screw you MTA, hello Old Stone House

So when we were putting together our list of desired ceremony locations, we thought about the Transit Museum as it fit with our Antique Brooklyn Theme (we've since modified to be A Postcard from Brooklyn).  How cool would it have been to have the ceremony on an old 1940's subway car then rent one of their buses to drive everyone to the reception? Really cool, that is, if they ever decided to return any of our phone calls or emails... oh well, on to the Old Stone House it is!

Getting it all together

Bill proposed to me in Barcelona over a year ago in August of 2009. The first words out of my mouth were "Is this a joke?" Which I keep having to reassure him that I meant that in the most loving way possible. Getting engaged was one thing, but actually planning a wedding was never a priority so we literally did nothing about it until 6 weeks ago. We also were in the middle of moving and planning a vaca to Mexico and partying and stuff like that. Looking at it now I'm glad we decided to wait and do nothing because I feel like we have a better, more precise idea of what is important to us. I actually hate weddings. I detest them. I pretty much hate everything about them, from the bridezillas, to the ugly bridesmaid dresses, the idea of bridesmaids in general (forcing your friends to fawn and slave over you leading up to your "big day") tickity tack decorations, the cheesy dj, spending what could be the down payment on a house on one day of your life (no house anywhere in NYC but maybe in the midwest somewhere), the list goes on and on and on.... so we cemented some ground rules- we are adhering to a strict budget, no wedding party, we demand lots of drunk dancing, and no one is invited. Its nothing personal but we wanted something intimate and that means most extended family and people we don't talk to on a routine basis are out. Our guest list is 76 people, that's it. So if you are invited you better feel special and come :) So in the 6 weeks since we started we have checked these things off our list:
- Reception place booked
- Ceremony space is picked out
- Hair, make up and photographer are booked (Thanks Hilary and Peter!!!)
- Officiant is booked (Thanks KB!!)
- Flower/decoration situation is under control (Thanks to my many Gays!!!)
- Special ceremony reading is booked (Thanks Carolina!!)

I'll keep updating as we go. We would really like to incorporate our friends as much as possible into the ceremony and festivities so if you have any ideas please let us know!!

Save The Date!!!

We were a little ahead of the game putting this together as we have already settled on the date and reception, now we just need to find a space for the ceremony.

Stay tuned for further details!
(The exclamation point is there because this is exciting)